What you know is not who you are

Over the dinner table my sons are arguing over a Maths problem. Ever seen one of those cartoons where an irate character turns bright red, steam shoots out from their ears and they whistle like a steam engine? We can all see it coming. The moment the 8-year old smugly informs the 5-year old he’s 1 digit out on a ridiculously complex sum. NOTHING will soothe the resulting rage except total agreement that the answer given was actually correct. And we’re all wanting him to be right, because it was so nearly right and he’s so hating being wrong. Only he is wrong – and we also need to help him learn. I’m going to let you into a secret – sometimes we let him be right simply because the trying was more important than the succeeding.

 

So tell me. Have you learned how to be wrong (or even just ignorant) without that internal steam valve going off somewhere inside you? Did you get taught that at school? Because being ignorant and being wrong are two of the most essential foundation stones of deep, powerful, transformational learning.

 

I count myself lucky being surrounded by peers, clients and mentors who take responsibility for healing the wounds that keep them stuck in fear. And let’s be clear – sometimes the initial wounding and the resulting healing are the necessary and powerful path to learning. Math is maths. The storm comes, destroys what we thought we knew and we build up again – better, stronger, more resilient. But maybe, just maybe, what we also need is to build spaces where play, wonder, curiosity, failure and the resilience it takes to try again are the right answer in themselves.

 

Next week I’ll be cracking open the hood on the internal workings of the Sage self. This part of us is immersed in the shadows of judgement, perfectionism and fear of failure. It’s also the source of our knowledge, thirst for learning, wonder, curiosity and self-expression. Join me in the fabulous, playful, magical, curious, failure-celebrating, soul-healing, world-shaping Hearthspace every Monday for the next 4 weeks to learn more about healing and developing your Sage.